Zoo
by CheekyBrunette
Summary: Needing a change of scenery, the boys go to the zoo.  Sweet enough to rot your teeth, and pretty much plotless. Just absolute cute, hopefully! Written for my SilentReader32456


**OKAY GUYS! This is a VERY special present for a VERY special person named SilentReader32456 because she's very stressed and has BUNCHES of work due today. Anyway. Giving her something ELSE to read probably won't help anything, but here's me writing her something anyway cause I feel all bad.**

**HAHAHAHAHA! I love West Side Story. "My daddy beats my mommy, my mommy clobbers me. My grandpa is a commie, my grandma pushes tea! My sister wears a mustach, my brother wears a dress, GOODNESS GRACIOUS THAT'S WHY I'M A MESS!" Haha, they're so bad... "We're ****disturbed, We're disturbed, we're ****the most disturbed, we're psychologically disturbed!" So boss...**

**Warning: I didn't do my homework with this. Everything about the LA zoo is COMPLETELY made up, so don't yell at me those who have been!**

"Let's _do_ something today!" Carlos grunted through his teeth as he sat upside-down on the couch, the pancake in his mouth flopping down over his eyes. Kendall nodded over him, standing on the cushions and drizzling a long, slow, steady stream of syrup into the Latino's mouth. Or, at least, he was trying to. The majority of it was pouring in spider-web-thin strands all over his face. Let it never be said that the blonde didn't love the Palmwoods' pool, but even Kendall needed a change of scenery every once in a while. He was about to suggest a trip to the mall, but James interrupted before he could even open his mouth.

"Let's go to the zoo!" he squealed excitedly, stealing the syrup and squeezing a good bit into his own mouth and ripping out a brochure seemingly out of nowhere. '_The things that boy keeps in his pockets-'_. Kendall's thoughts were cut off when the tri-folded paper was shoved in his face, a bright-smiled hippo staring at him. "Please, Kendall, please? I wanna see the zebras so bad!" Carlos rubbing his breakfast out of his eyes and giving him a begging look proved that he was onboard. Kendall shot Logan a questioning look, and he responded with a noncommittal shrug as he took a wet paper-towel to Carlos's cheek.

"You went with Jo that one day, but none of us have ever gone. It's a weekday, so there won't be too big of a crowd, and it's supposed to be really nice out," he said, breaking it down and thinking ahead in his Logan-ish way. His tone was neutral as he laid out the facts. Kendall was about to call it a go, when James grabbed his shoulders and looked at him in eyes in that too serious way of his.

"Kendall. I _need_ to see the big animals," he said dramatically, his eyes trained on Kendall solely and not paying any attention to Logan slapping Carlos's hands away from his face as he tried to stick things to himself. "This'll be my _first zoo._ It'll have lions and stuff, instead of that little nature shack thing in Minnesota that only had _real _animals!" he yelped, shaking the blonde a little. Kendall laughed.

"Relax, let's go!" he assured him, and tossed the keys to Logan who barely caught them as he was sort of focused on getting syrup off of Carlos's face, picking off the cherrios he was supposed to be eating for breakfast that Carlos had managed to get all over his cheeks. The Latino just smiled like he had gotten away with murder and gave a cheer as he stuffed his feet into his sneakers and rushed out the doors. A frustrated Logan chasing after him.

They were going to the zoo!

* * *

><p>"I hate the zoo!" James grumbled under the safari hat Carlos was making them all wear. His stupid puppy dog eyes. 'I bought them special!' Well, whatever. Admittedly, they all looked adorable, wandering around in the tan, plastic rimmed hats, but that was the problem. James wanted to be <em>hot<em>, not cute, and the big stuffed animal he was carrying under his arm from the Malibu Caribou Ring Toss wasn't helping matters. Carlos flashed him a very blue smile, tinted from the cotton candy he had just finished off.

"Aww! Come on, Jamie, we'll go see the zebras next if you wanna!" he offered, and James' face immediately lit up. They both look to Kendall hopefully, and he gave them the okay. Unbridled excitement shown in both boys eyes and they decided to walk straight to the zebras, which meant they were going to stop and take pictures of them in other silly hats, do their best to freak Logan out in the reptile house, and take a pit stop at the insect building. Kendall's eyes lit up when he caught sight of the ant exhibit.

"Woah..." His eyes traveled to a thin glass tube sticking out of the top of the ants' tangle of tunnels of a home. He followed the ants as they scurried into it and raced along. He lost them as they turned a corner in the display house. He walked for forever, trying to find the end of the tube and eventually did, rooms away from where it had started. He goggled as they're little legs sped them to and fro faster than he could expect from such tiny little creatures. Logan walked up from behind him.

"What are you looking at?" he asked curiously, following Kendall's line of vision to the ants rushing around in the glass cage in front of him and to the tube sticking into it. Kendall looked at him, his eyes wide and excited like they got before a hockey game. It was that same toddler-like look that Logan had been getting since they met.

"Look, Logan! Come with me and see how far they go!" the blonde grabbed his hand and started dragging him back to the ants' home, Logan marveling more and more the farther they followed it, Kendall all the meanwhile exclaiming, "we have to show James and Carlos, it's so COOL! They go so far, and they're so small, and it's awesome! And I heard those leaves way over twice they're body weight, can you imagine how much it would stink to carry something so heavy back? Man, that would stink! Oh, look, here's the start!" he finished as they reached the beginning. Logan's mind was blown. He snapped into action and snagged Carlos, Kendall catching James, and amazing them too with the ants.

"Wow," James breathed, and Carlos just nodded. That's when he saw it.

"Kendall, can we go in the butterfly room?" Logan asked, tugging on the taller boy's shirt. Something about the zoo was really pulling out the little kid in all the boys today, but it wasn't a problem, so Kendall let it go. He nodded and pulled out his wallet, giving each of his friends five dollars to get in. Carlos couldn't help but rush over, the kid ran _everywhere_, and jump by the door as he waited for them to follow. As soon as they had bought their way in, Carlos's face instantly attracted a passing butterfly. He looked down at it crookedly, sort of shocked but mostly pleased as James whipped his phone out to take a picture. Within another few seconds, a pink butterfly joined the one already on his face. It wasn't long before he had seven of them crawling all over him and lapping at his skin. Logan laughed.

"I told you to let me clean you this morning!" he giggled, expression bright and snapping pics with James. Carlos stamped his foot indignantly.

"I didn't know that _this_ would happen! It was just syrup!" he yelped, and his friends just laughed. Getting out of the butterfly room was tricky, as it was hard to get the little buggers to leave Carlos be without touching their wings and killing them off. Eventually, though, they made it thought the flaps and the doors and began yet again on their journey to the zebras. The hot afternoon sun beat down on their shoulders as they started a long climb up a steep hill to African Animal Avenue.

They were all panting when James let out a gasp. "Petting zoo!" he read off a sign, and immediately gave his friends a pleading look. They agreed immediately, the long trek up the hill getting old fast. They ducked into the little path that lead off the big road they were following and found a petting zoo metropolis before them, an oasis from the heat under a big canopy of leafy trees. Real trees too. You could really make anything grow in a zoo...

It didn't take much begging for Kendall to give each boy three quarters for feed. They walked into the gated area and James held his hand out for a sheep, giggling as it's little tongue tickled his hand. Logan timidly walked up to a goat and hesitated to feed it. A nudge from Kendall changed all that as his arm was involuntarily thrust out ward. The goat started lipping at the dried corn in his hand. Logan shrieked as he felt it's teeth rub up on his palm, earning an eye-roll old woman holding a hay-covered bunny next to him.

"Buck up!" she ordered and stomped off, giving the rabbit back to the petting zoo attendee and snatching her cane, leaving in a huff. Once she is gone, Kendall nearly started rolling on the floor laughing. It was good he didn't because the place was littered with little, nasty, farm animal droppings. It was pretty gross. So gross that James had opted to leave his Buster Clydes in the grass outside, risking stepping on it in his socks or having them stolen versus allowing a second pair of the expensive shoes to be ruined.

Carlos eyed another goat, staring at it as hard as he could, mumbling "come on, come on, come on," under his breath. The goat, meanwhile, just chewed on some hay lazily in front of him. He threw his hands in the air in frustration. He wished he could be like one of those guys in that commercial that could make goats die just by staring. Not that he had anything against the medium-sized, gray beast, but how cool would it be if it keeled over just because he looked at it?

Soon enough, the boys were cool and bored enough to continue their way up to the zebras. James crossed his arms and grumbled to himself. "I thought we were gonna go straight to the zebras," he complained under his breath. Kendall laughed out loud, obviously hearing him.

"You're the one who wanted to stop at every little thing along the way!" he exclaimed, taking off his hat and wiping sweat from his brow. A glare from Carlos made him stick the hot piece of plastic back on his head. He wondered how Carlos looked so chill wearing one of these for so long, but he had seen Carlos keep his helmet on throughout the day in temperatures reaching 110, so really it wasn't _that_ shocking. The kid had practice on his side.

It was taking forever to reach the top of the hill. '_Stupid false summits.'_ Logan cursed inwardly, tired of walking. They were all wearing down, it was hot. Apparently 104 was what the weatherman on NBC declared a 'beautiful day' as he had said earlier. His feet hurt, and he was seriously regretting not wearing shorts that day. Why did he, and all guys alike, feel the need to wear long pants all the time anyway? He vowed to himself that he'd never wear jeans on a hot day again, no matter how much they reminded him of home.

Not long after they had left the petting zoo, Carlos got tired of just walking. Instead, he crouched low and went on the look out. James gave him a crooked look. "What are you doing?" he asked, and Carlos didn't even pause in his weird behavior. He got in front of James, shuffling around him and throwing his arms out protectively, looking all around.

"I'm walking through the deep jungle," he explained, always one to jump on his imagination for a ride, "Better be careful; Jamie, you never know what could be out here." Logan and Kendall snickered at his nickname from back when they were little, and James glowered at them. Carlos, meanwhile, wasn't done. "You too, Logie and Kenny," he said obliviously. Kendall clenched his fists for a second and Logan just gritted his teeth in response to James's almighty smirk.

"Whatever you say, Carly," James responded and jumped into Carlos's crazy world, Logan and Kendall right behind him. Sure, they probably looked weird to passerby, but who cared? Not them, that's who. Realization dawned on James. "Carlos, these hats totally make it," he said with a nod. Carlos dropped his frantic activity to give him an 'I told you so' look, but only for a second. He was too in the zone to offer much else. The Latino nearly jumped out of his skin when a tiki head started blowing mist at him. He tapped it nervously, and once deeming it safe, he jumped into the cool mist. All four boys took forever to leave the spray, and they were soaked when they did.

Time goes fast when you're having fun, and they quickly made it to the zebra exhibet, only to find it closed. James sighed angrily, and Logan collapsed into a fit of laughter. Carlos was a mess of giggles too, and soon Kendall and James joined in on it. Whatever. They could still see the lions, and someone would probably be murdered if they didn't. They sure as heck didn't just climb a mountain to not see anything.

All in all, it was a fun trip to the zoo.

**I'm not kidding with you. They had one of those ant things in Cincinati and I couldn't even believe it. I whipped out my phone and video taped me going around with it and then sent it to "Al Contacts" as Carlos would say. It was seriously the most amazing things I've ever seen. Sheep are also my favorite animals to feed. My friends own a farm, and I LOVE baby-sitting them cause the sheep get fed when the parents are out normally and it's SO FUN!**

**I'm so mad. I feel like Logan's line up top made him seem like second in command, which isn't how I wanted it at all. That's James's role! So yeah, I feel all ashamed but I needed him to say a longish line and stuff so there it stays. DON'T LOOK AT IT!**

**FACT: If an octopus is hungry enough, it will eat it's own arms (Dude, we were JUST talking about octopi in bio today. You know they have a memory span for 6 months? That's way longer than a goldfish (5 seconds) and it doesn't even have a backbone!)**


End file.
